In the realm of infant influencers, toddler trendsetters, and Yoda-sized YouTube stars, debates are as common as diaper changes.
And, often, just as ugly.
From “cloth vs disposable” to “breastfeeding vs formula” to “paediatric vs pediatric,” the arguments rage.
Thankfully, one question has finally been fed, swaddled, and put to bed.
Who is the world’s happiest baby?
According to a groundbreaking study by the American Academy of Pediatrics (overseen by MIT), a survey of over 500,000 new parents, pediatricians, and happy children has unseated the former champion.
In his place, Cody Plofker’s daughter emerged triumphant. Not just “on the block,” but worldwide — from America’s West Coast (Los Angeles, California) to well beyond the English-speaking world.
First, let’s clarify: Cody Plofker did not conduct the aforementioned research. Nor did his luminary DTC newsletter — unoriginally named Cody Plofker’s Newsletter — sponsor the study.
He does, however, stand by the claim that his baby’s laughter can cure the Sunday scaries, Monday blues, and the dreaded Wednesday Weiss’s (see footnote).
“Everyone thinks their baby is the happiest, but mine actually has the data to back it up,” said Cody, beaming with pride. “At first, I only suspected she was the world’s jolliest baby. Now, I know better.”
Second, child development educators have cautioned other parents from competing.
“Even when Cody’s baby cries or gets colic,” reads the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development’s press release, “she still crushes cuteness. We especially warn those in the fourth trimester of their pregnancy to avoid putting undue and unmatchable expectations on their soon-to-be-born offspring.”
Third, as for what makes this particular baby so particularly happy, it all comes down to …
Oh, and gifts from Tapcart, Jacques Spitzer, and Shray Joshi + Zoe Kahn don’t hurt her happiness either.
This revelation has sent shockwaves through the baby community. Anxious dads and moms are now flocking to webinars and workshops, hoping to learn the secret behind this extraordinary happiness.
Numerous baby brands are considering endorsement deals — chief among them DadGang, in whose hats Cody has yet to make an appearance.
Even Hollywood couldn’t ignore such a happy baby. Celebrity parents like Chrissy Teigen and John Legend tweeted (or, X’d):
“We thought our kids were happy, but Cody Plofker’s baby is on another level. Where’s it’s f****** off switch?”
Footnote: “Wednesday Weiss’s” are what Cody told this reporter he calls the days he’s forced to suffer through recording Down to Chat with his notoriously finicky partner over at Jones Road Beauty, Eli Weiss.
Harvey Karp, MD, is indeed one of the most trusted pediatricians in America, author of The Happiest Baby on the Block, founder of Happiest Baby, and the inventor of the SNOO Smart Sleeper.
To be sure, his work revolutionized infant sleep with the 5s’s Shhh Cuddle Cure: (1) swaddling; (2) side or stomach position; (3) shushing; (4) swinging; and (5) sucking.
And yes, the SNOO Smart Sleeper remains the first and only medical device to receive De Novo Approval from the FDA for its ability to keep sleeping babies safely on their backs — thereby reducing the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS or SUID).
Nonetheless, Nina Montée Karp — co-founder and president of Happiest Baby, Inc. (which also owns SNOO) — told The New York Times: “Our life’s research has revolved around turning crying babies, fussy babies, and colicky babies into calm babies.”
“We can help your baby sleep. But don’t sleep on Cody’s baby.”
With LJ’s first birthday less than a month away, how is the organization preparing to face the challenge Cody’s daughter poses to its other franchise, The Happiest Toddler on the Block?
“You can’t prepare for something like that,” said Nina. “You just have to strap into your biggest bassinet and hope for the best.”
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